It is far too easy.

We’ve all done it at some point. Talked the talk but failed to walk the walk.  Whether telling a child not to say that word, knowing full well we are the only reason they know that word or giving our friend what we know is sound advice, if only we could follow it ourselves.

Yes, it is far too easy to say the right things and fail to substantiate our words with our actions. This phenomenon may be most prevalent amongst those of us who work with youth. It happens millions of times a day throughout the world, adults tell kids what to think, what to do, how to believe, how to behave, all the while failing to put their words into action in their own lives.

As Sources of Strength Adult Advisors, Trainers or Trusted Adults we consistently tell the peer leaders we work with of the importance of developing their strengths,
of having balance in their lives,
of not relying on just one thing to pull them through tough times,
that it’s brave to ask for help…
but those words of wisdom quickly become words without impact if we don’t live them out in our lives.

Often teachers, counselors, spiritual leaders and those who spend their day serving others are most in need of taking time to care for their own hearts/minds/bodies/spirits.

So take a minute and reflect, are you talking the talk without walking the walk? Are you being authentic or hypocritical when you tell the young people in your life to think positively, to ask for help, to be lovers of life?

So let’s stop, you and I. Let’s stop and take some time to be poured into so that we may pour out to those we serve. If we are empty, we have nothing left to give. Without having real and thriving strengths in our lives we cannot hope to convince others of their value nor help them to see their own worth.

Here are a few places to start.

• Think Positively/Practice Gratitude. Studies show that the simple act of taking 2-3 minutes every day to journal about something you are grateful for can over the course of less than a month re-wire our brains to scan our environments for the positive and break the cycle of cynicism and negativity. This can be a great activity for those working in high stress situations.

Watch this Ted Talk about the Power of Positive Thinking.

• Temet Nosce – the Latin phrase for “know thyself”. It is vital for you to understand you. What makes you tick? Do people give you energy? Does solitude? When are you at your best? Your worst? How can you increase and maximize the times when you are at your finest and working within your strengths, skills, passions and talents? Know what is important to you and take time to cultivate growth in that area. Don’t spend all your time focusing on your weaknesses and deficiencies, rather nurture and develop your greatest assets, your strengths.

Consider taking some personality tests and/or strengths assessments

• Feed your soul. C.S Lewis once said, “You don’t have a soul, you are a soul, you have a body.” Whether or not you consider yourself spiritual we can all agree that there is a deeper part of each of us that must be nourished if we are to live abundant lives. Find out what gives you a sense of peace, calm, direction, truth and be disciplined to find time in your schedule for those activities. Whether it’s music, reading, nature, journaling, dancing when no ones watching, channeling your inner child and chasing butterflies…
  Whatever it is, make it a priority.
  
  
• Practice Vulnerability. Sources of Strength work requires a ‘healthy vulnerability’ as we share our strengths and areas to strengthen in our lives. Obviously when we work with young people this vulnerability must be balanced within healthy boundaries, but to walk the walk means we need to share in healthy ways about our lives and strengths. So many young people seek genuine relationship with adults and understandably find this difficult when the adults in their lives lack any sense of vulnerability.
  
  I fully understand the reluctance to being vulnerable, the truth remains that vulnerability is the birthplace of creativity, innovation, joy, genuine relationship, and the ability to admit we need help and to ask for it.
  Whoever it is, find someone you can be vulnerable with and let them know you.
  Scars and all.
  Watch this Brene Brown Ted Talk on the power of Vulnerability.

This sounds great, but the truth is that we are all busy, very busy.

Our lives are full, but it is the wrong kind of full.

Not the full abundant vibrant kind, but the full busy hectic kind.

Mountains on our desks at work, constant demands of family, keeping up a healthy social life and trying not to fall apart physically are realities of life.

Here’s the thing though.

The truth of the matter is if we don’t pay attention to our own minds/bodies/hearts/spirits every other area of our lives will suffer for it. If we are full to overflowing we have excess to give and pour out to others. When we are drained and empty we have nothing left to give. In this work with young people we are running a marathon, not a sprint and it is important to take time to grow in our strengths, to reflect, to be vulnerable and to walk the walk of caring for ourselves. Your family is worth it, the great work you do is worth it, you are worth it.

All the best to you,

Scott

Greetings from Sources of Strength. In the past few weeks we have been accepted to the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration’s (SAMHSA) National Registry of Evidence-based Programs and Practices (NREPP). This is the highest tier a prevention program can achieve. It’s a great honor for our organization and for all the peer leader teams around the US and Canada that are impacting their schools and communities.

I found this to be an emotional moment for me as I immediately thought back to standing gravesite by many teens in the 1990's and reflected on the first steps of creating the strength-based peer efforts in the late 90's when most voices in the country were saying not to use peer leaders in suicide prevention.  Our early work in rural and tribal communities led to the holistic model represented in the Sources of Strength wheel today.

I also thought back to a cold November day in 2005 when Peter Wyman from the University of Rochester, Hendricks Brown from the University of South Florida, and David Litts from SPRC flew into Bismarck to see what this Sources of Strength deal was all about. Peter and Hendricks had just finished one of the nation’s largest research trials on gatekeeper training and were conducting a national search of peer led efforts in their attempts to address some of the gaps in prevention their research had found. That trip was the start of a rich and dynamic community-research partnership that is in full swing to this day. I feel blessed, amazed, weary, and refreshed as I think through the many years leading up to the NREPP posting.

“Upstream” prevention is a trendy buzzword today, but my sincere hope is to contribute to how suicide prevention is conceptualized in some significant ways.   Our goal is to empower local leaders, both young people and adults so they can truly create positive change.  With many schools already having been rigorously evaluated and a large number in our present five-year National Peer Leadership Study we can possibly be one of the first efforts to statistically answer the question of whether we are truly reducing suicide fatalities and injuries.

This is not easy work.  I was recently reading on how Community-Based Participatory Research is often spoken of, but how few programs are able to do this in reality, especially in large scale randomized trials.  Putting together a large randomized trial while listening, respecting, and learning from our community partners is not a task for the faint of heart. It is the high wire act of prevention - balancing the rigors of research with the challenges of maintaining true partnerships in schools and communities. Being able to make strategic change to Sources of Strength from two equally important directions - research outcomes and from the community/school input and experience.

Not easy work at all and it takes some great researchers like Peter Wyman and Hendricks Brown, combined with key stakeholders with vision for states, regions, and tribes.  Mix in some outstanding adults that will mentor and support peer leaders not just for a few months, but for a few years.  Add groups of local peer leaders with energy, vision, diversity, passion, and creativity.  Stir, support, train, support some more and something pretty special comes out.

What it means is that the NREPP posting is a great step in this process.  We get to pause and raise our glasses to each other and say well done.  So from across the country the Sources of Strength staff is raising our glasses to all of you and saying well done.

My vision of Sources of Strength is that after this powerful moment, we move back to work and continue to evaluate, research, and listen and continue to make an impact out in the real world. Implementing programs in schools, communities, and villages that are seriously challenged with limited resources, high fatality numbers, and day to day crisis threatening the ability to sustain prevention efforts. My vision is that Sources of Strength is never a finished product, but that we keep adapting, learning, marketing, and changing.   While we have products, curriculum, manuals, and resources there is no “finished product" in Sources of Strength. We keep making changes in our efforts based upon ongoing and expanding research and on the stories and experiences from our grassroots partners.

So thank you. Thank you. Much peace and do know that your efforts are greatly appreciated.  Let's keep lighting up our corners of the world and keep walking forward with a humble, inquisitive, engaged, playful spirit of awe that we get to go to work each day and actually save some young lives.  Pretty amazing.

Mark

So you might be asking yourself “Self, what has Sources of Strength been up to lately?”
Okay, odds are you aren’t asking yourself that but I’m going to answer it for you anyway…

This fall has been a very busy and very exciting time for Sources of Strength. Within two months time we were published in The American Journal of Public Health, The Los Angeles Times and Psychology Today. We were featured on All Things Considered on NPR and a Latino community group running Sources of Strength in Atlanta was featured by CNN Español! Needless to say lots of exciting publicity. But that is not what has been keeping us busy or what the Sources of Strength program is about.

Let me give you a snapshot of my fall:
I have flown in a fishtailing 16 passenger plane through the mountains of Wyoming. I have driven through the Georgia countryside and the Colorado mountains. We have been all over New York and North Dakota as we implement the nation’s largest study on peer leadership and its effect on suicide prevention.  I have watched the sunset over the Arizona desert from 30,000 ft. I have had tears fill my eyes as a senior girl shared of the loss of her brother to suicide. I have watched as teens have combated the notion that suicidal people cannot be helped. I have listened as teenagers took a hypothetical situation about dealing with friends struggling with suicide and showed us how nothing about it was hypothetical to them. I have laughed till I had tears streaming down my face, watching teenagers play the most ridiculous of games. I have recharged in the mountains of California. I have sat in strategic planning meetings with countless passionate people working to protect and empower their communities. I have spoken with salt of the earth YMCA directors who have made it their lives’ work to offer a place for kids to come have fun and feel safe. I have mourned as I spoke with a girl who lost her mother to suicide and is nothing but combative to the adults trying to help her, and I rejoiced in the opportunity we were providing her to find healing. I have gotten rug burns and pulled muscles as I tried my hardest to defeat senior boys in a game called Ninja Wars. I have sat in a room of LGBTQ students and listened as they shared of the challenges and intolerance they face every day and I was floored by the courage they have to be themselves, to fight to change things and make a difference. I have had the tremendous privilege to be a light in dark places, to speak truth to kids who have come to believe only lies and to watch the power of strength and hope save lives.

I believe in the work we are doing at Sources of Strength and I am so excited for where things are headed. We are working to expand Sources of Strength to communities in New Jersey, Washington DC, Manitoba Canada, Colorado and California to name just a few. We are evaluating what we do well and what we can do better. We are making a difference. Thank you for being a part of what is happening here, no matter how big or how small a role. We truly appreciate your support and encouragement.

Well now that you know what we have been up to, let us know what you have been up to in your organizations and communities. And if you have a favorite Sources of Strength moment, we’d love to hear about it in the comments!

Many Thanks,

Scott